So I figure since I am a little worn out, today is a good time to take it easy and talk about some casual topics that get thrown my way. So let's just relax and have a little fun this morning!
1) As a stay at home mom with 6 kids, how to you shower?
Ha!! This is a great question and I am the perfect one to answer it because I have no qualms answering honestly, and telling you that I am lucky if I get 3 or 4 showers a week. I either have to do it when Jeff is home or when the kids are in bed...and in all honesty when the kids are asleep and the choice is to either lay down myself or go shower- well, let's just say that laying down always wins, lol. So I shower a few times a week, but sometimes I will do partial showers, lol. Like if I don't have the time for a whole shower but I know Jeff will be home that night, I will stand in the shower and just shave my legs. Or I may just wash my hair in the sink another time. If I am going out- like on a date with Jeff or to church, I will do a full shower. And FYI, I have never yet gotten a complaint from anyone saying I look like Pigpen from the Charlie Brown comics, so I think I'm ok.
2) Do you get dressed/put on make-up every day?
This one also gets me laughing! Look, I am a total stay at home, homeschooling mother of 6-- there are entire days that go by without me seeing another adult, my husband included. Many days I do not officially get dressed. I mainly live in yoga pants (i.e., some kind of sweat pants or comfy pants) and a tank top. When going out, that is when I get dressed and do hair and make-up, but definitely not for my normal, in the house days (and trips to the grocery store do not count as going out). Now before you go feeling bad for Jeff and thinking that he lives with a schlep, let me just say this- I have asked Jeff many times over the years if he is satisfied with my appearance. I have asked him if he prefers me to have make-up on in the house, or nicer outfits when he comes home. He has expressed many, many times over the years that he is happy when he comes home and he wouldn't want me to have make-up on every day or to be dressed or whatever. If he ever expressed otherwise I would be very careful to honor that, because I believe it is very important to maintain my marriage and keep Jeff happy. But since he is happy as it is, I only get dressed and do make-up a couple times a week when going out.
3) How do you keep your marriage alive amidst the busyness of kids?
I have an amazing marriage. I am thankful every day for the man I am married to and the relationship we have. I could talk about communication and all that but the truth is, we are so stinkin tired from work and all these kids that I'm gonna have to say the biggest marriage saver is having a good sense of humor and being very forgiving with one another. Jeff and I laugh all the time- because sometimes its either laugh or cry, so we choose to laugh! You also have to be strong in give-and-take...sometimes I look at Jeff and I see he is about to explode so I will send him out for the night. Other times he can see I am melting down so he will send me out shopping for the afternoon. You have to really be giving with your spouse- there is not enough time to harp on what he is NOT doing for you- that's negative and will snuff out your marriage real fast. Instead just take a look at things on your end and ask yourself what you can be doing to help your spouse. Also, keep the sparks flying. Listen, I of all people understand how crazy life can be- we have 6 kids and hubby works 2 jobs, one of them has him working over night three nights a week. You have to get creative and you have to get fun. It's not usually candles, wine, and a lot of romance...many times it's wearing something cute under the stained sweatpants and sneaking upstairs together while the kids are watching tv. Other times it's a lot of laughing and a lot of affection throughout the day so that you still actually like each other by nighttime. All I am saying is that yes, it's going to be a little different in this crazy stage, but don't let it disappear! You have to fight for your right to paaaaaarty all night. Well, maybe not all night, but at least for a little bit when the kids go to sleep. Don't put your marriage on the back burner or one day when the kids are older you will wake up and realize you have nothing there. When my kids are older and don't need us that much, I want to have a relationship still going strong with Jeff, because the kids WILL eventually leave and he will be the one I spend my days with, and I want to make sure he still wants me and that I haven't pushed him away all these years.
|It won't always be like this. I promise.|
|Steal moments whenever you can ;)|
4) When do you have time to read your Bible and pray?
This has always been tough for me even before I had kids, because I think it is kind of boring to sit and read and pray, so I always have to really discipline myself to do it. Don't get me wrong, I love Jesus and I want to learn more about Him and I want to know Him through prayer, but it is very hard for me to sit still. But anyway, I have learned simply that it is something you just have to do. If you wait for the perfect conditions, it will never happen. Some days I spend time with God after the kids go to bed, other times I pray and read during the day and yes I do get interrupted, but that's ok. I like for my kids to see me pray. Once upon a time praying and reading happened in peace and solitude- but in this phase of life, you cannot expect things to be exactly the way you want them. Don't keep looking for tomorrow- take today and make the most of it, doing what you can when you can.